Pantomiming tampon in Rome

It was a Friday evening, at a dinner table for two, at a classic Italian pasta place, on a sidewalk somewhere in Rome. I was eating dinner with my friend Kim who I was traveling Europe with. We had landed earlier that day and weren’t staying long. We had train tickets to the Almafi Coast on Sunday. I shouted ” Go Big or Go Rome ” for the entire 36 hours we were there.

If you are a women reading this, you will be able to relate. One minute you are living your life and the next minute you think you feel blood releasing from your vagina onto your legs or into your underwear -if you wear them 😉

At the time I was 40 years old and already perimenopausal. I didn’t think I would even get my period the month I traveled.

I performed “the check” and sure enough, I found myself in a situation. It was around 8/8:30 pm and shops close early there. I asked our waiter where the nearest convenience shop was located, got the check and we made a mad dash for it.

Upon entering, there was only one gentlemen working. He only spoke Italian. I speak Spanish and it didn’t help. Speaking English wasn’t helpful either. Time was of the essence!! I tried making a sad look and rubbing my belly. It wasn’t working. I made a look of pain and couldn’t think of anything else to do but pantomime it. I put my leg up and made a motion toward my vagina like I wanted to put it there.

B.I.N.G.O

It worked. I got what I need and off we went back to our Airbnb for a hot shower, to crawl into bed and laugh ourselves to sleep.

When I am old and look back on my life, this will be a memory I think of fondly. Life continues to unfold as time goes by and I hope you can laugh at yourself instead of being embarrassed.

When in Rome 😉

There is no such thing as (mostly) vegan

I got a new upstairs neighbor weekend before last.

I wonder how long will it be before I hear some sex noises? The Sounds of Fucking

I have had a delightful 1.5 month break. Since we are still in a pandemic, people aren’t on the move as much and the apartment above me has sat vacant since the end of November. I couldn’t be happier.

I have really taken advantage! I have been listening to music and movies in a louder than normal fashion

When I saw someone moving in, I had to pop into the hall and introduce myself. I am always baking treats & love to share. I also wanted to know if one person or two was moving in 🙂

Turns out she is single, which doesn’t answer all my sex noise questions.

I started to explain… I like to bake, I am vegetarian, I eat well / organic / dairy free when she mentions that she was vegan until recently. She went to see a nutritionist. Since then she has started incorporating eggs and fish into her diet. I can appreciate that. Lately, I have been hearing how challenging it is to get all the nutrients you need from a strict vegan diet. Did you know that vegans do not consume honey?!

As soon as I learned, I knew I could never be a vegan. I was mentioning this to my new upstairs neighbor when she started to launch into her thoughts and feelings on the topic.

Bringing up being a Vegan in Portland, Oregon is like bringing up working in the strip club in Anywhere in Life. Once you get on the subject – good luck getting off it.

I was bored of the conversation three sentences in. Especially when she said that if you eat vegan during the week and non vegan food on the weekends that you can be ( mostly ) vegan. Ummmm, no you can’t.

How bout I am mostly skinny during the week except on the weekends when I am not?

By pure definition alone you don’t get to claim the label. There isn’t a grey area here. You either consume animals / animal byproducts or you don’t. Vegans don’t get to walk around with leather purses.

I felt the judgement rising in me. I did express that I didn’t think you could claim a word that communicates things to others if it doesn’t really apply to you. Then I changed the subject to say I had some treats to share. The whole reason I brought up food in the first place. Was she interested in some Peanut Butter Maple Bars or Banana Nut Muffins? She wasn’t because she just ate to which I retorted , You don’t have to eat it now. How could I think she would be interested with the tensions rising between us? Probably all my fault. I don’t know why it bothered me so much for her to misrepresent being vegan.

A few days later, I made some “peace offering” chocolate chip oatmeal cookies and put them in a Ziploc bag with a note on her door that said “I hoped she was settling in nicely to the apartment and to enjoy the cookies whenever”

I haven’t spoken to her since. I want to have a nice relationship with the people I share living space with. Even if it is the shared laundry area in the basement of the building we live in. There are only eight apartments in the building. Four of them are Studio apartments.

AND THEN LAST NIGHT

I heard her and her friends plodding down the stairs and out the front door of the building without masks on, shouting “Fuck it, lets go to the bar”.

Oh no. This says it all. I don’t want to sum up a person I don’t know however this speaks volumes. https://youtu.be/HKk91x0Yg7Q Red flags are flying high.

I will come back and update this blog when I hear sex noises. So far, 10 days and counting noise free.

Say a little prayer for me ❤

I don’t remember what it’s like-

to be little.

Do you?

They say that the mind makes up things. It fills in the gaps. It doesn’t get the details right. It is safe to say a person’s memory isn’t 100% accurate.

How far back can you go with a memory?

I mean a memory that stems from you and you alone. Not a story that is told to you about when you were little or a story you have told so many times that you may know it to be true but if you are honest with yourself, you can’t actually remember it, it is something you have memorized after telling many times.

 

 

 

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I would love to know how far back you can go so if you would be so kind to let me know in the comments below ❤